Five months in

Today baby E turns five months. Five months! Everyone always tells you how quickly it rushes by but I still can't quite believe that in just a few weeks it will be half a year since that sunny Tuesday that E entered the world. I am enjoying being a mum and having this time at home with him so much. It's also given me a little bit of time and space on those long buggy walks to think about the work I want to do. Everything shifts when you become a mama and the thought of going back to work in an office next year for someone else doesn't appeal much.

I have a few ideas on the back burner and I am concentrating on getting Little Green Pig, my writing project for children and young people, back up and running with some funding. I have started running fortnightly workshops again and it feels great to be using the creative side of my brain again. And I have started writing again finally! But more on that soon.

Stolen moments

Things are so much better when you have them just once in a while. English strawberries eaten just in summer taste so much better than dull ones flown over from the other side of the world in February. A meal out with girlfriends I had this week felt like such a special, treasured occasion now that most of my evenings are spent at home with the baby. And today, a few stolen hours to myself out of the house to have some head space to blog, plan and to write. It feels such bliss, but it really is a necessity that I should give myself each week.

I have barely written anything since Elijah was born. My journal is gathering dust at the side of the bed. In an attempt to plunge back into the writing life I have signed up for Amy's e-course, The Handmade Writer. Amy had the bright and generous idea of having a 'pay what you can day' to sign up to her course so I clicked the button and did it. I like supporting women who are setting up their own creative businesses, especially from my side of the world. I am looking forward to having prompts to write each week. And as someone who teaches creative writing myself through my Little Green Pig Writing Project I enjoy being the chance to be the student.

How do you carve out creative time for yourself and stick to it? I'd love to hear your ideas.

The power of words

Last month I was excited to have a piece published in The Guardian's family section. It had only submitted it a week or so before and I by chance found an email in my junk folder saying it was going to be published the next day. 

I wrote it anonymously because it was a bit of a sensitive subject and I didn't want the people involved to read it. And I thought they never would. But by a weird twist of fate, my uncle happened to be with my mum when I texted here to tell her to go and buy the paper. She did, and began reading it aloud before she realised what it was about. I was mortified, and although my mum assured me my uncle wasn't, I felt so embarrassed to think he had read it. 

As I begin to write more and more this is something I wonder about. How much of the personal do you put into your writing. I know that when I write, the personal has a way of weaving itself in there. I can't shut it out, and I don't want to. But it can get me into trouble. Tonight I've been working on another piece about a friendship. Again, it is sensitive and I wouldn't want the person involved to read it. I will keep it anonymous and if it is published, it will be in a magazine I doubt she'll have even heard of. But even so, I feel slightly anxious about laying this story out on the page. 

Do you struggle with this too? What do you do with the personal stuff - leave it in or leave it out? Has writing ever got you into trouble? 

You can read my Guardian letter here.

Celebrate

I have joined in Sunday Scribblings today, where the prompt is 'Celebrate'.

Right now I am celebrating:

1. Spring - daffodils everywhere, bare arms and legs in the ever-early British rush to strip off and get into summer gear, the hordes of people walking along the seafront.

2. Finally feeling that writing is becoming part of my daily routine. I naturally slink off to the bedroom to do my 30 minutes each evening and I'm amazed at how much I can actually get done over the weeks.

3. Getting an article published in 'Writers in Education' magazine.

4. Sending off a short story I finished last week. Who gives a damn if it gets published or not, I am just so pleased I submitted something!

5. Running 40 minutes without stopping today. 10 k race in May here I come!

6. The little things - a warm cat in my lap, time to lie on the sofa in the afternoon sun and read, walking along by the sea and feeling so lucky to live where I do. 

What are you celebrating?

A writing high

I've found it hard to blog about writing recently when, erm, I haven't actually been doing much writing. This has changed in the last week or so. I've started working on something that's a completely different genre to what I usually write. I've taken myself out of my comfort zone but I'm finding it comfortable. The words are flowing.

I've been setting myself achievable targets of 20 - 30 minutes each day to work on this piece and I find that I nearly always end up writing for longer than that. Last night I had that delicious plunging-into-the-well feeling where you lose track of time and place and the words fly from your fingers. The almost magical feeling of when you read back over your work and you barely remember writing it. The words flow easily and unselfconsciously. The writer's high.

I know I won't always find it easy like this. Recently the tap has felt stiff and rusty, the words have come out in slow, painful drips. The challenge is choosing to write no matter how you feel, no matter how the words flow. But for the moment I'm going to enjoy this while it lasts. 

A conversation over fish and chips

Him: So when are you going to write a book?

Me: Well I've started lots. But at the moment I'm trying to concentrate on shorter things, you know, short stories, articles, so I can get published and get some work behind me. 

Him: But when are you going to write an actual book?

Me: I will one day. 

Him: I might write a book. That would be good, wouldn't it. I'll just sit down and write one.

Does anyone else ever have conversations like these?  He does it to wind me up, surely.

Early morning pages

I have been doing Julia Cameron's morning pages now for a couple of months. It means I have to get up at 6.20 to fit it in between feeding the cat, spoonfuls of porridge and rushing out the door to the day job with my hair still slightly wet. I am not a morning person. But I have grown to love this twenty minutes of quiet before the world, and even the sun, wakes up. I feel as if I could write and write. It is such good practice. If you haven't already tried it, do.